Weaving simple, somatic practices within the coaching experience
I believe if you don’t include the body together with the neurodivergent mind, you are potentially missing out on a more comprehensive result overall. After all, the body keeps score with everything we experience, especially in the areas of triggers and trauma. Adding a little holistic approach will bring another dimension to the sessions and, in my experience, a little more fun too. By being in touch in all these areas, we will bring about a deeper clarity and understanding of who we are.
As neurodivergents have a unique way in which the nervous system functions, there are ways in which integrating daily mindful practices can help keep the mind, body, and brain calm and reduce the risk of daily triggers interrupting our routines. If we strip down what occurs in the body, it can help us adopt a more empathic approach towards ourselves and in how we react or respond at any time. Sounds easy, right? That’s because it actually is! Don’t overthink it, plan it!
In principle, it’s the repetitive practice that can lead us to a more regulated brain and nervous system that affects our whole being. The more you regularly practice something, the more you will reap the benefits. And the best part is being able to cherry-pick exactly what works for you. Living outside the conventional box is what we neurodivergents do best!
The Nervous System
Being ADHD will involve working with a vastly different nervous system than a neurotypical’s. How it affects us in the areas of the brain that are responsible for executive function and regulating the neurotransmitters of dopamine and norepinephrine. ND brains can feel compromised in the areas of motivation, impulse control, and task management simply due to the underactive function of the prefrontal cortex. ND brains are overall more sensitive to just about everything, which, if not addressed, can lead quickly to sensory overload and overwhelm that will plunge us into freeze mode. It is also important to remember that our nervous system is functioning on an interest-based reward system and not the conventional important-based one.
This can lead us down the garden path, playing and jumping from one shiny object to another with little or no direction in the world of priority. While it can actually be a lot of fun, it doesn’t always pay off, especially if the tasks we need to be doing involve bill payments and work deadlines! At the end of the day there is nothing wrong with skipping through the garden with wild abandon or beachcombing for hours on end, as long as the important stuff gets done at the end of the day.
It’s really about finding that balance in a seemingly unbalanced world for a neurodivergent! And if we are feeling a sense of enrichment through breathwork or a form of exercise workout, we are more likely to be able to feel good about approaching the mundane. (So we can reward ourselves with more good-feel activities!)
I don’t purport to have all the answers, but through trials and errors I have experienced, fine-tuning, and tweaking, I have eventually discovered what works and enhances my day-to-day. Together with my coachees, I gently introduce and suggest selective activities to be experimented with and collectively analyse what works to produce the best personal results within our sessions. Suggestions are there to be thought through and molded to suit each individual and are carried out during our sessions. They are potentially the grassroots solutions and are flexible to suit every need and wish. It’s fascinating to see how others manifest their own personalized mind and body workouts and workarounds, using breathing and meditation influences.
Some of my clients love to start off each session with a grounding technique. This allows the session to unfold from a calm space and enhances the session overall.
Simple 5-4-3-2-1- grounding tecnique
- Take a few deep, slow breaths
- Name 5 things you can see
- Name 4 things you can touch
- Name 3 things you can hear
- Name 2 things you can smell
- Name 1 thing you can taste
- End with a couple of slow, deep breaths
I’ve also met people that said they could never meditate for whatever reason. But what one conjures up as their form or view of something doesn’t mean the buck stops there. With a little ingenuity, meditation can evolve from the stereotypical and impossible lotus position (impossible for most and quite likely to involve a trip to A&E if you’re not careful!) to something personable, comfortable, and custom-made to suit the individual. Think you need to be static to meditate? Think again. Think you need to spend at least 20-30 minutes in silence? Think again! You can walk and meditate or swim and meditate. You can even grab a quick 5-minute meditation, even when you are stuck in a time-consuming queue. Think unconventional and stay out of the box and in the moment; you’re heading in the right direction!
How to calm the mind and abate those rising anxieties
A simple and quick succession of deep breathing can do wonders for our overactive nervous system, helping to reduce anxiety and improve focus. Coherent breathing or box breathing, takes minutes to perform, but the effects last much longer!
This technique involves slow and deep breathing to a specific count. For example, inhale slowly to a count of 5 seconds, hold for a further 5 seconds, and then release to a count of 5 seconds. Perform this simple yet effective breathing exercise the next time you feel elevated levels of stress or anxiety and feel the difference after the breathing exercise. I challenge you not to feel calmer and grounded! For that added security, visualize your special place. A safe haven you can escape to in your mind and deep breathe yourself there. Make a mental list of what each of your senses is experiencing:
- Seeing
- Feeling
- Touching
- Tasting
- Smelling
This extra visualization is when you feel completely overwhelmed emotionally or are experiencing the dreaded RSD (rejection, sensitive dysphoria).
(I will cover RSD in more detail in another post).
Shaking it off
Incorporating movement can also be a game changer. Even if joining a yoga class or Pilates is not your bag, you don’t have to give up on practicing a regular movement workout. It can be tailor-made to exactly what works for you!
Gentle exercise are the operative words here. Breathing and stretching are a great place to start! You don’t necessarily have to carry out vigorous workout programs.If anything, they can be too off-putting for most. Once more, it is solely about what suits you for your body and mind. An exercise that is not only enjoyable but also rewarding. When you think about the workout, it’s an uplifting feeling you get, as opposed to dread!
Cherry-pick movement that is aligned to you and your body and mind. Something you look forward to doing. Don’t set yourself up for potential failure with demanding exercises that will quickly taper off and leave you feeling as if you have failed or even hindered your desire to continue. There are countless exercises that are available online, free and easy to do, that only take up minutes of your day and require no equipment. The upside is that you can choose the movements you want to repeat and leave the rest, creating a personal workout for yourself that suits you for that moment of time. You can always chop and change as you please!
And if workouts aren’t your thing, dance is the next best thing and even better suited to anyone that really can’t stick to repeated sets of exercise.
Freestyle dance, making your moves to your chosen music of the day! There really isn’t anything as cool as dancing around your house or garden with not a care in the world! I would include singing as an option! It doesn’t matter if you think you can’t sing or dance. What matters is you do it with 100% freedom because the importance is not based on what anyone else thinks, but how it makes you feel!
You are what matters and what is important at that given time, and the freedom of expression, to allow that fluid flow of music and dance to lead you to those good-feel vibes!
Remember to be kind and gentle with yourself! And dance!
Photo credits: Main blog photo, exercise photo and silhouetted photo > ©Tim Goedhart > ©Christopher Cambell> ©Javier Allegue-Barros, respectively.
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